


Last Lullaby

by Morriggann, Roguex1979



Category: Chris Hemsworth - Fandom, Tom Hiddleston - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Breakup, Bring tissues, Dating, F/M, Feels, Jealousy, Oral Sex, Sexual Content, Tenderness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-01
Updated: 2014-09-01
Packaged: 2018-02-15 16:59:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2236605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Morriggann/pseuds/Morriggann, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Roguex1979/pseuds/Roguex1979
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alice & Tom have been together for five years but after one fateful night, everything changes. Still they must keep on living together. How will they fare?</p><p>***in which Tom is not an actor but a simple man***</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. The moral right of the author has been asserted. This story is published subject to the condition that it shall not be reproduced or retransmitted in whole or in part in any manner, without the written consent of the copyright holder, and any infringement of this is a violation of copyright law.

Alice closed her microphone and removed her headphones, a frown on her face.This last show was supposed to be one of the great ones, as she had planned a lovely interview with a local author getting her new book out and great new music to get people to discover. But everything had gone to hell, technical difficulties had arisen, the author hadn’t shown up.

 On top of that, her boss Angus had approached her about new tasks within the radio station.

Alice already was a devoted host, the musical director and now, Angus was offering her the programs director position. Usually, only people with over twenty years of experience would be offered this kind of position but Angus had said he was more than satisfied of her work and her initiative and this was his way of encouraging her to keep up her great work.

 Alice swung by her office, rubbed her face to chase the tiredness away and sat to sign a few papers, then grabbed her sweater and purse, heading out the door. This job offer was clearly interesting, especially on the financial side, but it would take more time away from home and she already wasn’t home a lot, since she had the night time show. This would mean being gone from 7am to 10pm and she just knew Tom wouldn’t be too pleased. He had already complained he didn’t see her enough, him having an 9 to 5 schedule. Alice only hoped he would understand this was in the best interest for her career.

 

~~~~~

 

“Champagne, sweetheart?”

 Alice shook her head, coming out of her thoughts, hearing Tom calling out to her. “Hmmmm..what?”

 Tom sighed and lowered his glass. Alice had been distant all night, lost in her thoughts, barely touching her food. She loved Barrafina, yet couldn’t be bothered to eat or to make conversation. Tom reached out, taking Alice’s hand, running his thumb over her knuckles.

 “Where are you, darling? You seem distracted.”

 “Just tired, Tom, it’s been a big week. Actually, there is something I need to talk to you about.”, Alice sighed.

 “So do I.”, Tom replied, pushing his chair back, getting down on one knee, a big grin on his handsome face. He retrieved a small black velvety box from his pocket, opening it slowly. “Alice, my love, I took you out tonight so we can celebrate. Tonight marks five years being together and I think it could also be a new beginning for us. I’ve loved you from the first moment, it’s not exactly a secret that you’ve bewitched me with your wits, your smile and your great…”

 Alice’s cheeks flushed and she quickly looked around the room at the gawkers. “Tom, get up from there, please. Everyone’s looking at us.”

 “But Alice…”, Tom said, colors leaving his face.

 “Time and time again, I’ve told you, I’m not ready. My career is barely beginning and I want to see it flourish. A house with white picket fences and a bundle of kids...it’s not what I’m looking for. Not yet. And you know that. Why would you insist again?”

 “Your career? What about your life? Our life together?”, Tom replied, annoyed. He stood, raking his chair on the floor and emptied his champagne glass in one long gulp. He loosened his tie and sighed.

 “You always do this, Tom,” Alice hissed through clenched teeth. “You put me on the spot, back against the wall. I’ve just been offered a position at work that no one, NO ONE with my five years of experience ever gets. For once, it’s my turn. I can’t pass it up.”

 “So when do you think you’ll be ready, huh? How long are you going to make me wait? I’m a patient man, Alice, but even I have limits!”, Tom shouted, getting up.  He picked up his jacket and turned away, aiming for the door.

 “Where are you going?”, Alice cried out, a lump in her throat.

 “You’re the big shot radio celeb, why don’t _you_ pay for dinner!” And he just left, slamming the restaurant door behind him.

 Alice sat, baffled at the turn of events. It wasn’t the first time that Tom had asked for her hand in marriage but he had always understood her reasons for not being ready, as every time, they were legitimate.

 A waiter passed by and she ordered a chocolate martini, sipping on it slowly as she tried to understand Tom’s reaction. His handsome face, usually always so open, had closed off completely upon hearing her explanation. “When did he stop listening?”, she asked herself. He had consistently been supportive of her career, wanting the best for her, and he knew it would be time consuming, especially in the formative years. A radio career could only be built by working hard, without ever paying attention to the time one spent at the station. Alice had explained that more than once to Tom but now, it all seemed that he had not understood anything.

 The night slowly evaporated into a few more drinks and when Alice started feeling tipsy, she flagged down a cab, heading home, hoping to talk to Tom, to make him understand. She quietly walked in, setting down her keys, purse and jacket and tiptoed to their bedroom. Tom was laying on his side of the bed, a hand fisted on his thigh but Alice couldn’t make out his expression. She undressed quickly and slipped under the covers, scooting closer to him. Just as she put her hand on his arm and opened her mouth to talk, Tom shrugged her off and stood up off the bed. He grabbed his pajama bottoms, putting them on rageously.

 “I would have thought that since I’ve been jilted yet again, that you would do the honorable thing and sleep in the spare room. But don’t worry, _I’ll_ make a further sacrifice.”, Tom spat out as he left the room.

 Alice watched him leave, her throat tight, and she pulled up and hugged her knees, burying her face in them. She had ruined it and it was over. Her five-year relationship with Tom was over.

 ~~~~~

**A few weeks later**

 Alice was finishing an early dinner before work when Tom walked in the kitchen, having returned from work. He settled his briefcase on a chair and dropped a file on the table, then sat in a slump, sighing heavily.

 “Well, after researching property prices in our area and looking at my finances, I can’t afford to rent or buy my own place on my salary. The mortgage rates are awful and selling this place after such a short amount of time owning it means there’s no positive equity. We’d both lose out.”

 Alice frowned and picked up the file, looking it over. The numbers on there shocked her. If they’d sell the flat, they most certainly would lose out, just like Tom was saying. And she loved this house, they had spent a copious amount of time finding it and decorating it to their liking.

 “Oh...I haven’t had time to look at my own finances, but just based on this, I know I wouldn’t be able to afford it either.”, she replied, chewing the inside of her cheek.

 Tom had a look in his eyes as he shook his head and ran a hand through his hair. “There is a solution, but you’re not going to like it.”, he said in a lower voice.

 Frowning, Alice looked up from the file. “What is it?”

 “Well, it’s been a couple of weeks since we broke up and it’s been okay, hasn’t it? I mean, we keep out of each other’s way, do our own things. There may be a few things we have to sort out, like not accidentally walking in on you while you’re in the bath…”

 Alice giggled, remembering she was in the tub when Tom had sleepily wandered into the room to use the toilet and was profoundly embarrassed when she squealed at him to get out.

 “Ehehehe!”, Tom chuckled softly. “I think we could make living together work long term. We hardly see each other anyway. What do you think?”

 “Well I guess it _could_ work.”, Alice pondered, hesitating for a moment. “Let’s do it. It would certainly relieve some of the pressure I’ve been feeling.”

 “Alright then, good! Well, roomie, I’m going to get changed and do whatever the hell I feel like.” Tom said, flashing a big grin, as he stood and grabbed his file. “Enjoy work!”

 After settling that, tension dissipated in the house and Alice and Tom went their separate way, still living together. Tom had his nine to five schedule while Alice worked afternoon and nights so they barely saw each other, merely on the common days off, which were incidentally rare.

 ~~~~~

 

It was a typical Saturday night off for Tom a few weeks later, reading with a nice red wine when Alice walked out of what used to be their bedroom, now hers, with a beautiful knee length midnight blue bustier dress on, her hazel hair twisted up in a loose bun with curls dangling on the sides and perfect makeup. She had her little clutch purse stuck under her arm as she was clasping her earrings on.

 Tom stared at her, his mouth slightly agape. "Wow, you look..." He shook his head. “Going out?”

 “Yes, I have a date tonight. And you? Quiet evening I see?”

 “Hmmm yes, Shakespeare night.”, Tom breathed out, waving the book as he gritted his teeth.

 He watched in silence as Alice finished getting ready, while his heart stung. She left, hopping into her car, and disappeared into the night, leaving Tom slightly devastated.

 Only a month and a half had passed and Alice was dating again. Tom was hurt but knew had no right to say anything, as he had put an end to their relationship after his last turned down proposal. He bit his lip as he flipped through the pages of his book, unable to concentrate on the old English text. Even wine didn’t remove the bitterness he could taste in his mouth.

 ~~~~~

 

Alice was twirling her hair as she looked at the short brown haired man sitting in front of her. He was awfully handsome, with his greyish eyes and light stubble but he was a chatterbox and his favorite subject was himself. Alice kept giggling at his comments, knowing it was only encouraging him to talk more, but she couldn’t help herself, seeing him dig his own hole a little more.

 She sipped on her wine while Paul started describing his everyday training regimen, his protein shake homemade recipe and his hair gel. Alice snorted in her wine and had to hide her grin in a napkin. She nodded, oooohed and aaaahed at everything little Paul said but couldn’t care less about what he was saying. He was not at all like Sandra, the radio station’s secretary had described him, which was “a good listener, polite and funny”. Well he was funny, unbeknownst to himself, but a good listener and polite? No. Just no. Hell no.

 The more the evening went on, the more Paul drank and the more his speech slurred. Having had enough, Alice asked for the check and paid for dinner, flagged down a cab and shoved Paul in, handing £15 to the driver to take her date home safely. When the cab turned the corner, Alice walked back to her car, asking herself if dating so soon was such a good idea.

 Driving home, Alice untied her hair, letting it cascade down her shoulders and sighed. It had been a long time since she had been on a date and she hoped it would get easier than Muscly Paul. Just as she parked in the driveway, she called her friend Lianne to let her know how the date went. Slowly walking inside, she dropped her keys in the bowl on the table and kicked her heels.

 “He was a total ass, Lianne. I’ve never seen someone so into himself. He practically kissed his own biceps while talking to me! No no, I’m telling you…”

 Alice kept went to the bathroom as she narrated her story and Tom heard the whole conversation, as he was still sitting in the living room with his book, reading glasses in hand.

 “I swear! He drank at least three quarters of the wine bottle, then ordered two beers and a gin and tonic. I had to pay for it all and throw him in a cab!”, Alice exclaimed.

 Tom coughed, hiding his laughter as best he could, a bit relieved Alice’s date had turned into a nightmare.

 “Next time Sandra tries to set me up, I’m telling her to go to hell. So how was your night, darling...?”, Alice asked her friend.

 Tom sunk back in his leather chair, putting his glasses back on, a smirk on his face. Alice wouldn’t be going on a date anytime soon and that pleased him.


	2. Chapter 2

Much to Tom’s consternation, Alice _did_ continue to date, even if she wasn’t intentionally looking.

 Alice had met Alexander at the coffee shop across the street from the radio station, picking up a chaï latte. He had accidentally bumped into her and dropped his coffee on the floor so Alice had bought him another one and they sat for a moment to chat.

 “So what do you do for a living?”, he asked.

 I’m a radio host for Heart Radio and also programs director. How about you?”

 Alexander’s eyes widened and he muttered something about real estate then flashed a smile, asking her out to dinner on her next evening off. He was cute and nice enough for Alice, as she had always fancied dark blonde men, so she agreed to meet up with him on Friday night at Beagle, close to Hoxton Station.

 As soon as they were sat, Alexander, who had dressed up like a fashion star, started to talk about his connections and to whom he had sold houses in the greater London area. He was blatantly obnoxious and stubborn, asking questions about famous people that had come through Alice’s studio.

 “But I mean, really, could you get me Adele’s number? I heard she was looking for a house!”

 “Ermm..no. We don’t give out private information such as a phone number.”

 “Then maybe you could get me her email? Come on...just bend the rules a little.”, Alexander insisted with a charming smile. “No one will know.”

 “I will. So, where did you grow up? What did your parents do for a living?” Alice said trying to change the subject.

 “Are you sure? If not Adele, maybe you could find me John Newman’s? He’s young and successful, maybe a new house would please him!”

 Alice sighed, a bit annoyed with Alexander but remained on target. “What do you do in your spare time? I really like to read, I enjoy movies and when I can, I take photography excursions.”

 Alexander snorted and sipped on his beer, unabashed by Alice’s questions. “Have you ever made friends with any of the stars on your show? Do you know if any of them need a house?”

 “Wow, it seems like you only asked me out for my potential connections.”, Alice joked.

 “Well, yes.”, Alexander said, a smug grin on his face.

 Alice’s nostrils flared and she stood with her wine glass in her hand, throwing it’s content in Alexander’s face. She grabbed her purse and stormed out, leaving a baffled Alexander and his stained white shirt.

 When she got home, Tom was in his usual chair, reading a new book. Upon her entry, Tom glanced up at her over his glasses briefly, but otherwise continued to concentrate on his reading. “You’re back early. How’d it go?” Alice slammed the door shut. “That well?”

 “Shut up!” Alice growled and stalked off to her room, missing the relieved smirk on Tom’s face.

 ~~~~~

 Alice was doing her show’s research before going on air when her Facebook messenger dinged. She looked up to see a message from Jamie, a Facebook friend.

  _ **7:36 JAMIE - Hey Alice! I hope you’re well. Angus told me you were single again so I’m taking a chance here and inviting you for drinks next Friday.**_

 Alice frowned. Jamie...who was he again? Jamie...Jamie...Jamie! Oh right!! Jamie! Alice remembered meeting Jamie at a work function a few years ago when she had started out as the drive host. He was cute and she remembered telling herself that if she hadn’t been with Tom, he definitely would have been a man she would’ve gone for. She pulled up her keyboard and typed an answer.

**7:40 ALICE - Of course I remember you Jamie! How have you been? This Friday would be very possible for me. How about we meet at 7pm at Castle Whatever?**

**_7:41 JAMIE - Coolio! Glad I get to see you again! ;)_ **

**7:42 ALICE - Perfect! See you then :D**

 When Friday night came, Alice took a taxi to the pub, since there was a big chance she’d be drinking and met Jamie in the front. He still looked the same as he did a few years ago, a couple of inches taller than her, slight build with hair down to his shoulders. Alice remembered his green eyes from when she had met him, as they had had quite the effect on the ladies present at the party that night. He hugged her as a hello and they went inside to get reacquainted.

 As the night went progressed, Alice felt relaxed enough to have a few Screwdrivers. Jamie was really fun, just the same as she remembered him, always a nice story to tell, an inside joke about Lianne or some plan he had for the future. Every time he spoke though, he would either brush her arm or grab a lock of hair, his knee “accidentally” touching hers. Alice saw through his moves, getting Jamie wanted more.

 Around eleven, Alice knew she had to go home, as she was working earlier the next day so she excused herself but Jamie insisted on riding back with her to make sure she got home safely. In the cab, Jamie leaned down for a kiss and Alice let him, only for a moment, and he gave her a quick peck on the lips. It was his persistence of wanting to hold her hand that made her feel uncomfortable. She suddenly couldn’t wait to be home and rid of him.

 By the time he walked her up the porch, he rushed her into the door, groping her breasts and shoving his tongue into her mouth. Alice tried to break free but he was stronger than her.

 “No, Jamie, stop,” Alice said trying to push him off her when he broke for air. “Look, I like you, but you’re moving too quickly!”

 “Come on, baby,” Jamie growled and held her tighter. “You know you want it.”

 Just as she was about to knee him in the balls, the door swung open violently and Tom grabbed her by the shoulders, pulling her away from Jamie and behind him, to create a 6ft 2inch barrier of lean muscle between her and the slime dog.

 “Who the fuck are you?”, Jamie shouted.

 Tom sneered. “I’m her overprotective brother. And I know taekwondo. So get out of here before I make you swallow your own cock, you prick.”, Tom answered, shoving Jamie away.

 The man stepped down the porch and disappeared into the street, leaving a shaky Alice walking back inside the house, Tom trailing close by. Alice put her purse on the kitchen table, leaning on it to take a breath and shuddered at the thought of what could have happened had Tom not been home.

"Al, are you alright? Did he hurt you?”, Tom asked, his voice full of concern as he walked closer to her, lifting her chin to make her look at him so he could tell if she was lying or not.

 Alice stood straight, looking at him, and untied her hair. “I’m fine. Just glad you were home.”, she sighed. She looked at Tom and was suddenly mesmerize by the shade of his eyes in the evening light. She sucked in a breath, looking at his lips, so close to hers when Tom cleared his throat and pulled away, muttering a good night. Alice swallowed hard, shaking her head and walked to her room, to sleep the night away.

 ~~~~~

 After those disastrous dates, Alice decided to give a chance to online dating sites, picking Match.com. It was quite hilarious to see some profiles but some were genuinely interesting, like Patrick, a young good looking irishman now living in London, working in an advertising agency. She was quite smitten by his description, by his likes and dislikes and also his looks. His picture showed a tall and well built brown haired man with blue eyes and dimples in his cheeks.

 Friday night, at exactly seven o’clock, Alice was fidgeting in front of the Marianne on Chepstow road, waiting for Patrick. He was a half hour late already and that royally pissed Alice off.

 “Excuse me, Alice? Hi! I’m Patrick.”

 Alice swiftly turned around. In front of her was standing a short bald guy, way older than he had said, and most of all, he had no dimples, only sagging cheeks. Alice cleared her throat and followed him inside, still, wanting to give Patrick a chance.

 “I’m sorry, I don’t have my real picture on there. It’s just so vain, to base an opinion on looks. I’m much more than that.”, Patrick explained.

 Alice listened to him talk and talk and talk about himself, not once asking her about her life or interests. At one point, someone that obviously knew him came up to their table and Alice saw it as her salvation. She quickly escaped without a word, running to her car parked a little higher up the street.

 When she got home, she slammed the door in an angry sigh, and in the living room, Tom looked up from his newspaper, his eyebrow cocked high.

 “Wow, I think that is a new record!”, he chuckled.

 “Shut up, Tom.” Alice muttered, removing her shoes.

 She went straight for the bar she and Tom had set up in the living room and poured herself a shot of whiskey, coughing as it trickled down her throat. She grabbed the gin and tonic bottles, brought them to the kitchen table, then found ice in the freezer and poured herself a tall glass. The alcohol felt amazingly good going down her throat and she sat, propping her feet up on another chair.

 "Want some company?”, Tom said, dropping his newspaper on the table.

 Alice poured him a drink as well and slid it his way, as he sat across from her.

 “Do you remember the last time we got drunk on this?”, Alice asked, staring at the ice in her glass.

 Tom smiled and nodded. “When we moved here. After spending the day unpacking and being exhausted from the heat wave.”

 “Yep.”

 Alice gulped down the last drops and poured herself another. She looked at Tom, who had taken off his reading glasses and rolled up his sleeves. He still looked like he was the day she had met him, his black locks in a tousle, his grin almost mischievous.

 “And remember that time when you dropped the whole packet of rice coming back from the supermarket?”

 “Oh gods, yes. We found rice everywhere for weeks after that. In my shoes, on the carpet…”

 “Everywhere we carried it.”, Tom giggled.

 Until the early morning hours, Tom and Alice reminisced of happier times, slowly emptying the gin bottle. When he stood to get to bed, he stumbled a bit over Alice and she grabbed him just in time, her hands at his shoulders. Tom looked down, his eyes a bit droopy, and hitched a breath, seeing her so close after such a long time apart. Alice caught his stare and felt flushed, his hot breath on her.

 A mess of limbs, of alcohol spilled and sounds of a bottle crashing, that’s the scene someone would have seen, had they walked in. Tom grabbed Alice’s ass and propped her up, sitting her on the table then reached and cupped her face, while she grabbed his forearms, leaning back. His mouth was on hers in an instant, their tongues fighting for dominance. Alice moaned when Tom pressed himself into her, feeling his hardness on her mound when she wrapped her legs around his waist. Tom reached down and lifted the hem of her dress, bunching it over her thighs and ripped off her flimsy underwear, throwing them to the floor, as Alice unzipped his trousers and pulled his stiff cock out. She rubbed her thumb over the tip, staring right into his eyes and Tom growled, kissing her again.

 When he finally thrusted inside, Alice howled and let herself slowly fall back on the table, her hips rolling with Tom’s thrusts. He held her still, ramming in and out while he pressed his thumb over her nub. Tom threw his head back and growled, burying himself deeper inside every time he went back in.

 “Oh fuck, oh fuuuck!”, Alice whined, her eyes rolling back as she felt her orgasm nearing.

 “Come on, baby, cum for me!”

 Alice arched off the table when she came undone, holding on to Tom’s hands for leverage and screamed out her pleasure, while Tom hissed when she clenched around him, spilling himself deep inside of her. They both panted, eyes closed, as they came down. Tom gathered Alice in his arms and even in his advance state of drunkenness, carried her to their former bedroom, now hers, as the morning light slowly started creeping in.

 ~~~~~

 Alice was spending the day at Lianne’s, even with a throbbing headache, result of a massive hangover and not wanting to think about the sexy mistake she and Tom had made. Her friend was having a welcome home barbecue for her husband, who had been away with his platoon in Afghanistan. Actually, the whole platoon was there and it was funny for Alice to see so many uniforms at once and trying to remember the names of each and everyone.

 As she made her way with trays of food through the troops, literally, one guy kept smiling at her, always checking her out. “Does he really think I don’t see him? Big scruffy guy, kinda hard not to notice!”, she told herself. As she handed out drinks and burgers and crisps, she finally got around to him and he stood, towering over her like a giant.[](http://s1162.photobucket.com/user/Morriggann/media/864e08a5-5de5-4f0e-9bfd-0715e87a3a14.jpg.html)

 

“Hi! I’m Chris! So sorry for staring so intently. It’s just...your smile, it’s so beautiful!”.

 Alice sucked in a breath, hearing his Australian accent and she smiled, now staring right at him.

 “It’s alright. Hi! I’m Alice! So, you’re not wearing a uniform, so how do you fit in all of this?”

 “My brother Liam is over there, he’s with Lianne’s husband in the platoon. She invited extended families so, we’re all here with him. Kind of crowded, isn’t it?”

 “Very much so. But everything’s just about done. Now it’s mostly relaxing and games for the kids.”

 “Then if you’re done here, how about we go get a drink elsewhere, so I can get to know you properly?”, Chris smiled, his blue eyes shining.

 Alice nodded and hurried up to tell Lianne she was leaving, heading to a local pub with Chris. They walked there, talking like they had always known each other, Chris telling her about his life in Australia up until his late teens when he had moved to England and Alice told him about her life as a radio host. Hours went by quickly and they realized they had much more in common than army men, but Chris ended up leaving, as his family was waiting for him. When he saw her to her car, Chris gently pressed Alice back onto the door, cupping her face and leaned down, his lips brushing hers. It was one of the most gentle kisses she had ever had in her life and she felt shivers running along her spine. Out of breath after their lips mingled, Alice pulled back and made sure she would see him again, stealing his phone to enter her number in his contacts with a cheeky wink.

 ~~~~~

 Tom woke up in the late afternoon, groggy with a headache the size of Buckingham Palace. The bed was empty, Alice nowhere to be seen. Alice. Tom smiled. Even with how drunk they were, getting to be with her again meant the world to him. Getting lost within her body, even if it had been rushed and nowhere near the level he would usually make love with her, seeing her blissfully screaming in pleasure, sleeping with her nestled in his arms, Tom truly felt like she might be coming back to him. He forced himself up and showered quickly. He knew she was off all weekend, for once, so he went out to the shops and bought everything he needed to make her favorite dinner, veal parmigiana.

 He took his time, making sure everything was set up right, candles on the table, a nice wine breathing by the glasses. When he heard come in, Tom rushed to the door with a smile, only to find her completely lost in her thoughts.

 He chuckled and snapped his fingers. “Earth to Alice?”

 Alice smiled and looked at Tom dreamily, as she walked straight to her bedroom. “I’m fine. Just had a great date. Hope you had a nice day! G’night!”, she replied, closing the door behind her.

Tom’s shoulders slumped as he realized last night had meant nothing to Alice, at least not how it had meant to him. He snuffed out the candles, threw out the veal and went to bed on an empty stomach and an aching heart.


	3. Chapter 3

Over the next few weeks, Alice met up with Chris for dates, here and there, whenever her schedule allowed it. He was patient with her, knowing how hard she worked and always understood when she had to cancel. He took her to a romantic picnic in Hyde Park, then she brought him to the premiere of Guardians of the Galaxy, which they both loved. On early mornings, he sometimes picked her up for them to go run together along the Thames, perfectly comfortable in silence. Alice loved those mornings, although she wasn’t that fond of running. But seeing Chris in different situations made her discover him in new ways that pleased her.

 Alice was happy with how things were going, slow but steady, though she was completely enthralled with Chris, almost gawking at his every word. He never pressured her into anything, always a gentleman when he took her home at night. For Alice, it was very strange, yet comforting to think she could find love again.

 It was an early Friday evening, a few weeks after their first kiss, that Alice was getting ready for her date. She was excited to be going to a play, seeing Richard III with Martin Freeman, an actor she loved. After putting braiding her hair in a crown on the back of her head, making a side bun with it, she applied discrete makeup. Her dress went down to her knees, a nice crinoline skirted one with tiny shiny black beads on the skirt and the bodice slightly ruched with large straps covering half her shoulders. Unable to zip it up completely, she went to get Tom’s help, who was cooking himself dinner.

 “Hey, Tom? Can you zip me up please?”, she asked, walking backwards.

 Tom grumbled something, zipped her up and went back to his pots and pans without a word. Alice noticed how grumpy he looked. In fact, he had been grumpy and unfriendly for a while. He barely spoke to her when they crossed each other in the house, always behaving slightly childish.

 She put her hand on his arm, squeezing it gently. “What is it, Tom? Something bothering you at work?”

 Tom put down his wooden spoon and frowning, looked down at her. “How is it that you have more time off now than when WE were together?”.

 Alice was startled by his question, but answered honestly nonetheless. “I cut back at work. I’ve been transferred full time as a director and am not hosting my show anymore. I do some research and manage the others, book interviews and prepare the new season. I have my nights off now.”

 “And you couldn’t do that when we were together?”

 Alice didn’t have time to answer his question as the doorbell rang. She pulled away from Tom, slipping on her high heels and went to answer. Chris looked stunning in his black tuxedo and white dress shirt. His lapels were velvety and his cufflinks made up to be little bluebells, the official flower of his native region in Australia. He smiled widely seeing her at the door and his blue eyes along with his light scruff made Alice shiver.

 “Hello gorgeous! Ready for our night?”

 "Yes! Let me just get my clutch and shawl and I’ll be right there.”

 Alice went back to the kitchen to get her things and Tom followed her to the door. He eyed Chris, his mind racing. He looked very familiar but still couldn’t put his finger on it.

 “Tom, this is Chris Hemsworth. Chris, Tom Hiddleston, my...errr..roommate.”

 “Where have I seen you before?”, Tom asked, shaking Chris’ hand only to be polite.

 Chris shrugged, feeling that same strange sensation of having met Tom before. “Nice to meet you, mate!”

 He offered Alice his arm and they left, as Tom stared intently through the window. “I’m not your mate”, he muttered to himself. He closed back the drape over the little door window and went back to his dinner, finding it burnt in the pot. He ran his hand through his hair and sighed, turning off the stove and picking up a beer in the fridge. A bag of crisps in hand, he sat in front of the television, trying to catch the end of a cricket match but his heart wasn’t in it. In fact, his heart wasn’t in much of anything. His mind kept going back to Chris. Tall Chris. Muscular Chris. Younger Chris. Tall, muscular, young Chris being with Alice.

 Tom put down his beer and sunk in the sofa, his head pressed against the cushion. He missed Alice. He avoided her as best he could now, only he felt her presence everywhere, even in her absence. He closed his eyes, trying to shove away the thoughts of her in Chris’ arms.

~~~~~

 Alice’s eyes were wide open, scanning everything inside Trafalgar Studios before they left. The play had been magnificent and there was a long standing ovation at the end, Alice clapping as loud as she could. Chris had proposed a late dinner but they were late for their booking so they picked up something at a Chinese restaurant, taking it to Chris’ flat.

 Eating with chopsticks made for an interesting moment, rice flying everywhere, just as much as giggles and snorts. Sitting crossed-legs on the floor, Alice kept trying to show Chris how to use his chopsticks but being so built with such large hands, he found it next to impossible to hold them between his fingers.

 “Really, gorgeous, I can’t do this. Fork for me, chopsticks for you.”

 “Alright, fine!”, she laughed as she sat beside him on the couch. “At least you tried!”.

 “Can I try this instead?”, Chris murmured, his face suddenly serious as he leaned in closer.

 He cupped Alice’s face and brought her to his, his lips gently pressing on hers. “Please do.”, Alice whispered, snaking her hand behind his neck. Chris drew her onto his lap, his kiss deepening as he wrapped her arms around her waist. Alice pulled back to take a breath, almost giggling. “Are you going to fork me now?”

 Chris chuckled, his lips kissing her shoulder and looked up, his blue eyes locked with hers. “If you want me to, beautiful.”

 Alice breathed in and cupped his face, kissing him gently. “How about I stay the night, big guy?”

 Chris grinned and wrapped her legs around his waist, standing up slowly. He kissed her again, as he held her tight in his arms, and carried her to his bedroom, closing the door with his foot.

 ~~~~~

[ ](http://s1162.photobucket.com/user/Morriggann/media/7ae1634f-b0c1-4d50-8821-a2baeb1a5ac2.jpg.html)

 

Tom rageously sighed, shutting the drape on the door for the umpteenth time. It was past midnight and Alice still wasn’t home. He sat in the living room, staring at the muted screen and drank a long gulp of his Jameson.

 The minutes slowly turned into hours and every time Tom looked at his watch, his heart twinged a little more. He went up to look out the window again but there was still no sign of Alice. He poured himself another drink, sitting on the edge of the sofa and finished it in a large mouthful. Alice wasn’t coming home. Alice was with Chris. Alice was staying over at Chris’ and that was killing him.

 Feeling something wet on his hand, Tom looked down and realized, sucking a breath in, that it was a tear. Touching his face, he wiped his tears and settled his glass on the coffee table. Alice wasn’t coming back to him, not now, not ever. Tom stood, holding a sob, and walked to his room, collapsing into bed. And although the combination of the alcohol and exhaustion from the late night caught up with him almost as soon as his head hit the pillow, the sleep was fitful, and he'd be feeling it in the morning.

 ~~~~~

 

The weekend had not been easy for Tom. Alice hadn’t come back until late Sunday afternoon, looking happy and, well, sexed up. It was all he could do to ignore the burning jealousy in his heart. And after another uneasy sleep Sunday night, he was sitting at his desk Monday morning, rubbing his face to try and help him remain focussed on his stats.

 Kim, one of his senior advisors came over to him at about 11am, after the morning rush of calls. “Really sorry, Tom, but I’ve got a customer on the phone wanting to make a complaint about his due date change and the fee involved. I told him that the fee applies, but he keeps going on about how he’d told the dealer that he always wanted his due date on the 1st.” She gave him the agreement number and directed him to the online scanned documents. “I checked the paperwork and can see the instruction very clearly, so someone at the set up stage mucked up.”

 Tom sighed and blinked at the jumbled words in from of him. He was having trouble concentrating, but made a show of looking for the information. Then something caught his eye. The person who had set up the agreement on the system was...Chris Hemsworth.

 So that’s where he’d seen Chris before! He’d probably walked passed him in the hallways a dozen times and never acknowledged his presence. A glint appeared in his eye and a small smirk played at his lips. “Waive the fee, and apologise profusely. If he’s incurred any bank charges, tell him to send in proof of the charges and we will refund them for him.” Kim nodded and rushed back to her desk to advise the customer.

 Taking down the agreement number, Tom went to the New Business department and looked for his friend, Andrew, who was another manager, all the while looking around for the blonde oaf that was dating Alice. When he couldn’t see him, he shrugged, but still wen to speak to Andrew, hopefully to take the wind out of the Australian’s sails and knock him down a peg or two.

 “Hey, mate, how’s it going?” Tom asked Andrew at his desk.

 “Good, Tom, busy. You?”

 Tom nodded. “We’re taking a lot more calls today. A bit short-staffed, but doing okay otherwise. Look, I need to ask you about a set up that was done by a Chris Hemsworth? Caused a big problem for my team. Seems Chris didn’t take note of the due date request and so the customer got charged for a bounced direct debit. I’ve had to waive the fee and apologize.” He cleared his throat. “Newbie?”

 Andrew shook his head. “Nah, he’s been here a good few months now, and he’s very good. He wouldn’t have made a silly mistake like that. Let me have a look.” Andrew took the agreement number and punched it into his computer. He looked at the date and notes and corresponding input on their systems. “Ah! Right: seems Chris’ login was being used by a newbie he was training that day.”

 Tom gritted his teeth. _Damn!_ he thought. “Well, yes, but surely he should still have caught the mistake? I mean, won’t that other newbie now not know to check these things?”

 Andrew sighed. “Look, Tom, I know there is a little ‘war’ going on between New Business and Customer Services, but the thing is that it’s the customer’s responsibility to make sure they call to change the due date when we send their welcome packs out and it tells them when their first payment comes out.” He smiled. “Customers are your problem once they’re set up.” He winked. He had no idea of Tom’s personal feelings about Chris.

 “Is Chris here today?” Tom asked, not know why.

 “No, he’s off today. Working the weekend.”

 Tom rubbed his chin. At least that meant Alice wouldn’t be out with him. “Okay, thanks, Andy.” Then he grinned, putting his little vendetta aside. “Make sure your guys are in line so we don’t have to clean up your messes.” He dodged the crumbled up ball of paper, laughing, dancing aside. “And that belongs in the data protection bin!”

 ~~~~~

 

The weekend was slowly underway, Tom sitting in the kitchen having a late breakfast when Alice walked by, putting her jacket and scarf on, brushing her hair out of the way.

 “Not working today? Going somewhere?”, he asked, chewing on a piece of bacon.

 “Yeah, going to see Chris. You? Big day ahead?”

 Tom chuckled to himself, swallowing a mouthful of eggs. “Chris won’t be there, he’s working this weekend.”

 Alice’s head snapped as she backed up in the hallway. “And how would you know that?”

 Tom cleared his throat, slightly flustered. “I knew I had seen him before when you introduced him. He...uh...works in the New Business department.”

 “So you’re spying on him? On us?”

 Tom put his fork down and wiped his mouth. “Come on Alice, what are you doing with him? I know that kind of guy! He’s young, blonde, good looking and immature. But talk to him long enough, you’ll find a vapid mush.” He waved his arm indicating his face.

 “Mind your own damn business, Tom! You don’t even know him!”

 Alice shouted those last words and stormed out, slamming the door behind her, making the painting from the hallway fall from its hooks.


	4. Chapter 4

As the weeks slowly passed, Alice got comfortable in being in a relationship again but felt uneasy. Since they had started having sex together, Chris was changing. Sure, he was sweet and kind, but he was more nonchalant towards her, more cavalier even. More so than once, he’d cancel their dates, bail on her when she visited him to be with his friends.

 The Australian charm was dissipating and Alice felt strange when she looked at Chris from afar, around his friends. He was immature, impolite and sometimes, without manners. Alice wondered how it was that she hadn’t seen it before and realized that Chris was good at hiding things. The more she observed him and spent time with him, the more apparent it became that they were extremely different and not headed in the same direction in their lives.

 The last straw came on a Friday evening when they were having dinner together. Alice had spent two hours making slow roasted lemon and garlic chicken, Chris’ favorite, along with beans and rice. She loved cooking for him, having missed it while she was single. Chris was to arrive momentarily from work so she changed quickly into a skirt and tank top, styling her hair a bit and when she heard ruckus in the lobby, ran quickly to meet up with Chris. She stopped in her tracks seeing Frank, John and Corey wrestling along while opening beers and poking the chicken in the casserole. Chris smiled and came up to her, kissing her roughly and acting like a jerk.

 Alice pushed him away and sighed angrily. “What the hell, Chris? I thought we were having dinner tonight! I’ve been cooking for hours, I even cleaned _your_ flat. And now, you’re brought the guys over?”

 “Yeah, it’s Friday night. We’re having a Battlefield 4 tournament. I told you last night.”

 “No, you didn’t. _I_ told _you_ last night that we were having a nice dinner alone.”

 Chris grabbed a chicken leg and munched into it. “Well, gorgeous, they’re already here. I can’t just tell them to leave.”

 Alice closed her eyes and gritted her teeth. That was it. She’d had enough. She sucked in a breath and shook her head. When she opened her eyes again, Chris was chewing loudly, making jokes with his friends. Alice went to his bedroom, gathered the things she had been leaving when sleeping over and threw them in her large messenger bag, then did the same with her toiletries and clothes, then headed out to the lobby. Chris looked at her, his face changing.

 “Where are you going? I thought we were having dinner?”, he asked.

 Alice put her jacket on, wrapping her scarf around her neck and finally spoke. “I don’t know what the hell you’re doing, but I’m leaving. Don’t call me, don’t come over. You’re done playing me and I’m done letting you. We’re done.”. She walked out, slamming the door behind her.

 ~~~~~

 A few days later, Alice dragged herself to the bathroom, feeling bloated and tired, and started preparing for work. Dark circles had formed under her eyes and the strain of ending her relationship with Chris along with her over growing tasks at work were slowing doing her in. As she found a washcloth in the cabinet, her eyes fell upon a box of tampons. Her heart stopped. She grabbed it and leaned on the counter, trying to count down how long it had been since she’d had her period.

 Even with as much concentration as she  could put in, Alice couldn’t remember. Shakily, she showered and got dressed and as soon as she was sitting in her office, called her doctor for an emergency appointment, knowing full well what could be happening. Unable to work, she watched the clock, constantly cursing to herself that it wasn’t turning fast enough. It seemed the hours were neverending until the end of her work day, but finally she arrived at the doctor’s office. After the usual exam and blood tests, Dr Anderson sat down in front of her, reviewing her charts.

 “Well, Alice, it’s like you thought. Your hCG levels show that you are into your eleventh week at the moment.” She smiled. “Congratulations, you’ll be a mum!”

 Alice stared, unable to speak, a long shiver coursing through her body. Pregnant. She was pregnant?

 “Would you like to take an appointment now for an ultrasound? Have the father present?”

 The father? Oh dear sweet mother of….Alice held in a sob and started counting backwards in her head. Eleven weeks….eleven weeks...that was before Chris...was it?. She stood straight up, looking at Dr. Anderson and told her she’d call back soon. Grabbing her purse, she ran outside to her car, locking herself in.

 She opened the calendar on her phone, looking at her datebook, counting the weeks. “Eleven weeks...one...two….seven….OH JESUS! It’s Tom’s.” Eleven weeks was the night she’d had a date with Liar Patrick, as she had nicknamed him. The night she had gotten drunk on gin and had sex with Tom.

 “Oh my god. It’s Tom’s.” Alice let out a sob, her hands clasped over her belly. She was expecting to be scared, sad, angry but to her utmost surprise, Alice was happy. She was genuinely happy about being pregnant, and most of all, happy that it was Tom’s. It changed everything for her, meaning there was a possibility of a future with Tom, at least a connection with him.

 It was past seven when she got home and saw Tom’s car in the driveway. “Perfect,” she told herself. “I can talk to him now. How am I going to tell him that?”

 As she walked inside, she went straight for his bedroom, finding the door closed. She knocked softly on the door. “Tom, can I talk to you for a moment? There’s something you need to know. I...I know that it’s been strange between us for a while and I’ve been away a lot...I’ve been different with you...aloof even.” Alice struggled with her words but this time, knew she needed to let her heart speak. “But you know….I...Tom, I made a mistake with Chris. He and I are done. I thought he was someone I could spend time with..maybe my life but I was wrong. I was so wrong. I was just trying to replace you...because I miss you so much. I mean...we were together for five years. Five wonderful years where we were both happy, I can never deny that and neither can you. I let myself get swarmed by work and forgot what was really important, us. We can work this out, I know we can. Tom, can you come out here so we can talk?”

 The door opened and out came Tom, dashing in his charcoal suit and white dress shirt, fixing his sleeves. “Sorry, I was in my closet choosing a suitable tie, didn’t quite catch any of that. You were saying, darling?”

[ ](http://s1162.photobucket.com/user/Morriggann/media/358873c1-784d-480c-ae2e-bea28d37e732.jpg.html)

 Alice looked at him, her jaw dropping and stuttered, trying to answer. “G-g-going out?”

 The doorbell rang before he answered and he let in a tall blonde woman, just as tall as he was, her legs neverending. She smiled at Tom, kissing his cheek and stepped in. She was undeniably gorgeous.

 “Alice, this is Anastasia. Ana, this is my roommate Alice.”

 Anastasia pressed her hand on Alice’s arm, shaking her hand and smiled. “Hello! You have such a lovely home! You must tell me who decorated it!”

 “I did.”, Alice whispered. What?...When had Tom started dating? Had she been so caught up in her own life that she’d ignored him so much over the past weeks that she hadn’t noticed? Come to think of it, he _had_ seemed less grumpy with her and since she’d spent a lot of her time at Chris’ she hadn’t noticed if he went out or not.

 She cleared her throat and offered a drink to Anastasia while Tom finished getting ready. The more she spoke with her, the more Alice understood Tom’s attraction. To Alice’s horror, Anastasia was sweet and kind, funny and charming, everything Tom was. Everything she used to be, so long ago, before she had let work get in the way.

 “Ready, love?”, Tom smiled, coming out of the bathroom, freshly shaved and his black hair styled the way Alice always loved.

 Anastasia stood, saying goodbye to Alice and they left, leaving her sitting alone in the living room, with her growing baby and sorrow as her only company.

 ~~~~~

In the morning, Alice was almost surprise to see Tom preparing for work, as she had almost expected him to not be there at all. Donning his reading glasses, he read the paper as he buttered up his toast, sipping his coffee along the way.

 “How was your date?”, Alice asked in a small voice.

 Tom grinned widely, looking up at Alice, who was standing on the other side of the table, still in her robe. “Amazing! Anastasia is wonderful and we have so much in common. She plays tennis, she loves Shakespeare almost as much as I do, she wants a whole football team of kids.” Alice couldn’t help but _think_ there was a tinge of smugness behind him telling her all this, but it was probably just her hormonal imagination, since his smile was so bright and genuine. He stood, putting his plate and cup in the sink, grabbing his suitcase. “I’m seeing her again tomorrow night. Have a good day, Al, I have to go.”, he said, hurrying to the lobby.

 Alice leaned on the kitchen table, palms down, to hold herself up. “I love Shakespeare. And I’m pregnant. And it’s yours, Tom.”

 But Tom was already out the door, not having heard a word. Alice slumped on a chair, choking on her tears. “I’ve lost him. God, I was so stupid and I lost him.”, she told herself, crying all her pain away.

 ~~~~~

 

“Surely she’s not that awesome, Al!”

 On her day off, Alice was sitting in a café with Lianne, slowly telling her the latest developments. Tears were forming in her eyes but she’d be damned if she’d be seen crying in public.

 “I’m telling you, she’s awesome. I want to hate her so much, Li, but I can’t. She’s charming, she’s funny...and she makes him smile. The same way I used to.”

 “Are you telling me you want him back?”, Lianne asked.

 Alice couldn’t bring herself to tell her friend that she was pregnant. It had only been a few days since she had found out that one: she was pregnant, and two: that Tom now had a girlfriend that wanted a truckload of kids. She still was unsure on how to deal with the situation, lost among this avalanche of information. The only thing that made her happy, albeit scared, was this baby growing inside of her.

 “I don’t know, Li. I think it’s too late. He’s with her now. He was gracious enough not to say anything when I started dating Chris, what kind of person would I be if I did, now that he’s found someone?”

 Lianne reached out and took Alice’s hands in hers. “You’re way too gracious to be unlike him in that sense too. I’m sorry, hun, but I think you need to move on.”

 “I think you’re right. No, I know you’re right. It’s just a matter a doing it.”

 Alice got up and paid for their coffees and they headed out, walking arm in arm, as Lianne told her about her husband’s latest grand idea, building them a deck in their minuscule courtyard, but Alice didn’t hear her, her mind stuck on Tom.

 Just before dinner, Alice picked up some thaï food, actually enough for an army. She had been realizing that she was getting hungrier and hungrier already but feeling sick most of the time as well. She knew it was a matter of weeks before she’d start showing and she knew she had to tell Tom. Since thaï was a mutual favorite, she brought some for him, even a fortune cookie, even though it was from thaï food.

 When she got home, she was happy to see Tom was as well and she hurried inside, dropping the food boxes on the table. “Hey Tom! I need to…”

Tom was home alright. He was home and shoving his tongue inside Anastasia’s mouth, kissing her wildly, groping her thigh, as she was sitting on his lap on the sofa, a movie playing in the background. Alice backed away in silence, grabbing her food and she ducked in her bedroom, completely mute. She opened the pad thaï container, but put it away, suddenly disgusted by the smell, instead cracking her fortune cookie open. Alice muffled her sob when she read it:

[ ](http://s1162.photobucket.com/user/Morriggann/media/Capture-11.jpg.html)


	5. Chapter 5

“Alice, can I see you in my office?”

 Alice swallowed hard when Angus called her out into his office, sensing his stern tone. She followed him quickly and sat, as he closed the door behind her.

 “Is something wrong Alice? You’ve been utterly distracted lately, you’re late for work, you...Alice? Are you crying?”

 Alice was leaning over, her hands covering her face, loud sobs escaping her mouth. “I’m sorry, Angus, I can’t do this anymore.”

 The weight of her workload had grown too big for Alice in the recent weeks and as much as she wanted to succeed, she had come to realize it was too much for her. The strain of it all on top of being pregnant had driven her to slack off.

 Alarmed, Angus went around his desk and sat on the chair by Alice’s side, forcing her to look at him. “Dear gods, lass, what’s the matter? Are you not happy here?”

 “I was happy Angus, I’m not anymore.”, Alice hiccuped, trying to control herself. “It’s too much for me. I’m so sorry to disappoint you.”

 She got up and ran out, grabbing her purse and keys in her office and heading out, hot tears rolling down her cheeks. Driving without really paying attention, she ended up parked in front of Lianne’s house. She sat there, sobbing loudly, letting out all she had been bottling up. It was a long while before she heard a knock on the window. Lianne was standing there, hands on her hips, waiting for her to open the door. Alice pushed the unlock button and Lianne sat in silence, waiting for an explanation that didn’t come.

 Alice sat, staring at the steering wheel. “I’m pregnant.”, she blurted out. “And before you ask, it’s Tom’s.” Saying it again only made Alice cry harder. Lianne leaned it and circled her shoulders, drawing her in, rubbing her back slowly.

 “It’s going to be fine, hun, we’ll manage, okay?”

 “No we won’t...I think I might have gotten fired today. I just ran out of the office. I don’t know. I DON’T KNOW!”, Alice shouted.

 She pushed Lianne away and got out of the car, pacing on the sidewalk. “What the fuck am I doing with my life, Lianne? I got pregnant on a drunken night with my ex, which I’m still living with while he fucks another, I’m failing at the job I’ve been wanting for years...I’m….I…”

 Alice screamed out and fell to her knees, her body spasming in sobs. “Lianne, I’m so lost. This is not where I wanted to be at thirty! Single mum, jobless, alone, lost.”, she breathed out.”

 Lianne knelt by Alice, gathering her in her arms and shushed her like a child, rocking her slowly. “Al, you’re not alone. You’ll never be alone. I’m here, I will not let you lose yourself. And whether you have this baby alone or with Tom, you will always have me.”

 Alice sobbed for a while longer before being able to stand again, wiping her tears away. Lianne hugged her tightly and cupped her face. “Now, you’re going to get back into your car, you’re going back to the station and talk to your boss. There is no way you’re keeping a job you’re not happy with. But first, go and explain yourself.”

 Alice nodded, chewing the inside of her cheek and hugged Lianne once more. “I don’t deserve you. Thank you, babe.”, she whispered. She squeezed her friend a bit harder and finally let go, sniffling.

 She got back inside her car and drove all the way back to the station, running up the stairs to find Angus still in his office, even this late in the afternoon. She knocked on his door and saw his red mane swishing as he looked up from his computer.

 “Alice! Lass, where have you been? You scared me half to death leaving like that. Now come here, talk to me.”

 Alice stepped in and closed the door, sitting in front of the burly Scotsman. “I’m so sorry Angus, I...some things have changed in my life lately, I’m having a hard time adjusting.”

 “Lass, it’s really okay. I could see something was wrong lately, I just didn’t realize. I put too much pressure on you with that new position, didn’t I?”

 “I wanted it, and I really wanted it to work, but I can’t. I’m sorry I failed you.”

 “Stop apologizing, it’s alright. You didn’t fail me, nor did you fail anyone. I’d rather you tell me now then quit on me later because you’re going out of your wits!”

 Alice’s chin was quivering, as she was on the verge of crying again. “Really? I mean, I love working here, but I can’t do this. I can’t manage people, I hate it. If I keep doing this, I’ll end up ripping people’s heads off. I’m a host, Angus. I want to talk to people, entertain them, keep them informed. I want to go back to that.”

 “Say no more, Alice, we’ll manage something. Especially since that new kid we hired is a bit overwhelmed filling your shoes on air. Lass, you’re essential to making this station run smoothly. Don’t you worry, alright? We’ll make it work.”

 Relieved, Alice stood and sending conventions to hell, ran around the desk to hug a laughing Angus, then headed home, her heart a bit lighter.

 ~~~~~

 

It was a late Sunday morning and Alice should have been resting, as she was starting her new schedule in the morning, taking back the mid morning and afternoon shows. It was a lighter load and she knew she could ease back into it without a problem, as well as tending to the musical selection committee once a week, to decide which new song or artist would end up on air. Even knowing that, her mind couldn’t wrap around sleeping and neither could her stomach, as she was kneeling in front of the toilet, heaving and retching whatever she had been able to eat in the past few hours. It wasn’t much, merely soup, saltine crackers and tea but still, it seemed to be too much for her.

 Tom was getting up slowly, after getting home late the previous evening, having had a date with Anastasia. He hadn’t stayed over at her place, since she was getting up early today for a family brunch. As he passed by the bathroom to brush his teeth before going for a run,  he saw Alice vomiting, holding her hair back from falling in the toilet. Concerned, he stepped in, squatting down to her level. He put his hand on Alice’s shoulder. “Al, are you alright? What did you eat? Did you get drunk last night? You’re so pale.” Alice shook her head before heaving and retching again, her face almost buried in the toilet.  Laughing nervously, Tom rubbed her upper back. “You’re not pregnant, are you?”

 Giving him a dirty look, Alice hitched a breath and finished emptying the contents of her stomach. Shocked, Tom stood, wavering a bit and gripped his hand on the countertop. “W...what?” He staggered backwards slightly before frowning. “Well, I hope you and Chris will be very happy.”, he let out, his voice flat and without expression. He turned and walked out the bathroom.

 “It’s yours, Tom.”, Alice blurted out, wiping her mouth with a tissue.

 Tom’s jaw dropped as he turned around. Alice stood again, proceeded to brushing her teeth while Tom stared intently. She then walked to the living room, sitting across from him on the sofa while he sat, stiff, on the ottoman.

 “Chris and I are not together anymore. I broke up with him a few days ago. You were right...he’s immature and frankly, he’s an ass. But I won’t get into details...just know that it’s yours, Tom. I’m a little over twelve weeks. If you count back, it’s our...drunken night. On the kitchen table?”

 Alice tentatively looked up at Tom. His face was closed off as he still stared at her without a word. “Tom, I think we made a mistake. We were so good together and I went and screwed it up. I was so caught up with work and I lost the best thing that ever happened to me. And now...there’s this little one growing inside of me. So...I talked to Angus and I quit the programs director’s position. I couldn’t do it anymore. I’m back to being a host and having a normal schedule.”, Alice breathed out. “I wanted you to know. I miss you so much, Tom. I made a mistake, a horrible mistake. But I still love you. I’ve never stopped, really. I love you.”

 Alice breathed in again, holding in the tears that were threatening to come out. She looked at Tom and he stood, his eyes dark but still, she couldn’t make out his expression.

 “Tom, say something, please! I just...I don’t know how much more I can say for you to believe me. I’m just..I’m so sorry! Talk to me, please!”, Alice pleaded.

 Without a word, Tom turned and walked away, grabbing his jacket on the way and slammed the door as he left. Alice stood, her mouth agape, and the tears she had been holding in poured out, like a dam had broken inside of her. Falling to her knees, she buried her face in her hands, crying out everything that was left in her and even more since she had found out about the baby. She crawled up to the sofa, curling into a ball, holding her belly, sobbing in the cushion.

 It took a long time for her to emerge from the wall of pain she had stumbled upon. Staggering to her feet, she walked to the kitchen and grabbed her mobile from her purse, thinking music could soothe her to sleep. She buried herself in her covers, twisting her legs around the comforter. After a few classical pieces, one dreaded song came up on shuffle before she had to skip it and tears flooded out again, as she sang the lyrics to Lullaby to herself.

  ** _All the time I have layed in your love_**

**_When your love kept me safe through the night_ **

**_All the time I was sure you were mine_ **

**_And before time demands our goodbye_ **

**_Can you sing me a last lullaby?_ **

  
Her voice faltered as the song progressed, all the while caressing her growing bump. “I’m so sorry, baby, I tried, I really tried. I really wanted it to work.” She buried her face in her pillow, feeling hollow yet not quite alone.

 


	6. Chapter 6

The sun had slowly start to set when Alice opened her eyes, as she heard rustling in the hallway. She managed to sit, her face itchy from the dried tears on her cheeks, and her eyes widened when she looked out towards her bedroom door. Tom was standing there, as straight as a soldier, sheepishly smiling, holding a small brown paperbag in one hand and a large bouquet of pink roses and baby’s breath in the other. Alice hitched a breath and smiled, her eyes filling with tears again.

 Tom walked up to Alice’s bed, kicking his shoes off, and climbed on. “Please don’t cry, Al. Oh gods..you’ve cried all day haven’t you? I’m an ass...leaving like that. I’m sorry. I’m sorry…I...needed to talk to Anastasia.”

 Alice took a whiff of the flowers, hiding her face a bit. “Oh?”, she whispered, biting her lip.

 “I had to tell her. There’s no way in hell I’m leaving you alone. This is my baby, our baby, Alice. I can’t be with someone else when I now know we have a future together. It’s all I’ve ever wanted.”, Tom explained. “I know I pushed for you to accept my marriage proposals, but…I guess all I wanted to know we were going somewhere. I’ve never stopped loving you. Seeing you with Chris killed me, that’s why I started moving on. But Alice...a baby!! Do you know how happy this makes me?”

 Alice mustered all the restraint she had not to launch herself in Tom’s arms, trying to contain the joy that was threatening to explode from her and took Tom’s hand, looking into his eyes. “What about Anastasia? Where does she fit in all this?”

 “She doesn’t. And she was so gracious about it, she understood completely. Family is important to her. I mean..she hadn’t even introduced me to hers yet because she wanted to be sure it was right between us. When I told her about the pregnancy, do you know what she did?”

 Alice shook her head, telling herself that Anastasia was too good to be true. Tom rubbed his thumb over Alice’s knuckles. “She stood up, hugged me and wished us all the happiness in the world, because that’s what a baby can bring us. She walked away with a smile. I mean...I love you, Alice, but she’s some kind of amazing, isn’t she?”

 “Truly..she is. I’m so thankful she let you go without a fuss!” Alice scooted closer to Tom, tentatively resting her hands on his shoulders. “Are you mine, Tom? Again?”, she whispered

 “Always! I don’t think I’ve ever stopped being yours, love.”, Tom whispered, drawing her in for a kiss. He barely brushed her lips with his, his nose rubbing on Alice’s. “I love you.” He pulled her close, splaying his hands on her back but stopped in his motion pulling back slightly. “You didn’t throw up again, did you, darling?”

 Alice smiled, burying her face on his chest. “No, no, I didn’t. I think I probably vomited everything I ate since last Christmas today.”

 “Oh, Al! I’m sorry! But here, I brought this too." Tom said, unwrapping a box of ginger biscuits from the brown paper bag. "Ta-daaah!". Alice giggled and snorted while Tom threw the paper away. "I...I was told these help with the nausea.”, Tom added. He opened the box and fished a biscuit out, nibbling it just to taste how it was. “Well, I hope you like ginger, because this is quite strong!”, he added, pursing his lips as he scraped the crumbs with his tongue.

 “I do, I mean...come on, Tom! With the amount of thaï food I eat, you’d think a girl loves ginger!”

 Tom laughed out loud and leaned in, capturing Alice’s mouth, kissing her hard, for all the nights he had missed her and wanted to kiss her. His lips entwined with hers, his tongue gently licked her lower lip, asking for access. Alice parted her lips, her hands gripping Tom’s hoodie at the shoulders, then clasping on the back of his neck. Tom groaned and his hands slowly ran from Alice’s back to her sides, then up to her breasts. Alice twitched in a groan and Tom pulled back, concerned.

 “Is is too soon? Did I hurt you?”, he murmured.

 “No, no...just...be careful. They’ve been extra sensitive lately.”, she said in a small voice.

 Tom smirked evilly, a twinkle in his eye, and palmed her breasts, his large hands massaging slowly. Gripping his black curls, Alice leaned back and sighed, losing herself in Tom’s touch. She had missed him so much and she was finally home in his arms. Tom leaned down again, his mouth trailing slowly from her neck to the collar of her tank top, breathing in her scent.

 “I’ve missed you, Alice. I’ve missed your scent, your body, your arms, your heart. I’ve missed you. I love you so much.”

 Alice grabbed Tom’s face and brought it to hers, tears glistening in her eyes. “Will you marry me, Tom?”

 Tom hitched a breath and buried his face in her neck, gently kissing the tender skin. When he looked up again, his eyes were filled with tears as well. “It would be my honor to make an honest woman out of you, Alice.” Alice giggled and kissed him soundly and Tom smiled,  as he grabbed the box of biscuits and the flowers, plopping out of bed to drop them on Alice’s dresser. He stopped and looked thoughtful. "One moment, darling," he said and hurried out of the room.

 Alice couldn't stop smiling and bit her bottom lip wondering what he was doing. He was only gone for a few seconds when he came back into the room, a huge smile on his face. In his hands was the small black velvet box that he'd presented to her all that time ago, before all this began. "You...you kept it?" she stuttered as he sat next to her on the bed and opened the box.

 "Well, I had always hoped...wished...that we would end up back together and I had an inkling that I might need it again." He grinned boyishly. "May I?" Alice nodded and held her hand out for him. He took the ring from the box and slipped it on her finger. It fit perfectly. "There," he said taking her hand and kissing her knuckles and the ring all at once, "that ring is exactly where it belongs now."

 Alice reached for him, wanting to feel him as close as possible and wrapped her arms around Tom’s back, drawing him in as she leaned back. On all fours, Tom hovered over her, his eyes scanning hers. Alice grinned, as Tom did, and he leaned down, kissing her slowly as he ran his hands along her body, slowly lifting her black tank top above her head. His smile grew wider when he realized Alice wasn’t wearing a bra and like a hawk, he descended on her, palming one breast with his hand while he snatched a nipple in his mouth, toying with it slowly, his tongue circling it.

 “They’ve grown bigger already.”, he whispered lowly. “If that’s any sign of what’s coming, I will burying my face quite a lot in your cleavage in the coming months, love.”

 Alice exploded laughing, having missed Tom’s naughty side and she ran her hands through his hair as his mouth made his way to her purple boxer shorts, his teeth tugging on the elastic band.

 “Oh Jesus Tom, don’t make me beg!”, Alice pleaded.

 It was Tom’s turn to chuckle as he rose up to his knees, pulling his hoodie and t-shirt over his head. Alice basked in the glow of his body. She remembered every bump of muscle, every crease line, even that little tuft of hair between his pecs. Rising to a sitting position, she reached for him, sliding her hand over his stomach, then tugged on the hem of his trousers, drawing him in again and Tom gripped the sides of her face, kissing her roughly, his tongue exploring her mouth, Alice sliding her hands inside his boxer briefs, grazing his ass. Tom groaned and pushed Alice down, sitting on his side to take off his slackers, snickering as he did because his long legs were giving him a hard time in this position.

 Regaining his composure, he nodded his chin to Alice’s knickers. “Off with yours, love.”, he commanded,

 Alice easily slipped them off, then settled comfortably against the pillows, as Tom crawled to his knees up to her, his mouth on her belly, straight up to the valley of her breasts, his tongue leaving a long wet trace and he kissed her again, Alice gripping his shoulders. She raised her hips and wrapped her legs around Tom’s waist, her core grazing against his throbbing erection.

 Tom pushed her back now, shushing her. “Oh no, not yet, love. There’s so much more to do first.”

 He slid back and leaned down, burying his face against her mound, kissing it like it was the lost treasure of Atlantis. He darted out his tongue and exposed Alice’s wet folds as he slowly licked up and down, only to circle her hardened nub. Alice shrieked, sucking in a breath, and she gripped Tom’s hair, begging him for more. With a low chuckle, Tom used the flat of his tongue to engulf her whole sex, licking it slow, feeling Alice vibrating with pleasure against his mouth. He reached up, gently grazing the sides of her breasts, his nails smoothly raking down until his hands were on the lower part, then cupped them, teasing her nipples by flicking them with his thumb. He knew how much Alice always loved when he did that so he continued, as his tongue traced down to her entrance. He darted it in, pushing it inside her core as far as he could, causing for Alice to arch her back up off the bed as she moaned loudly, her hands covering Tom’s on her breasts.

 Alice cried out as she came undone, climaxing on Tom’s mouth. “Oh god yes!! Tom! I’m already...oh god!”. She laid back down, breathing heavily as Tom came up to her, leveling his eyes with hers. “I’m sorry, I couldn’t...I couldn’t hold back!”, she apologized.

 “Don’t you ever apologize for that! You’re so gorgeous when you cum, my love. Shall I try again?”, he whispered on her lips, making Alice taste herself.

 She didn’t reply but snaked her hands between his arms and body and pulled him over her, his weight almost crushing her, as she parted her legs wider, hooking them on his waist. “I need you, Tom. Now!”

 With a whimper, Tom kissed the tender skin on her collarbone as he guided himself in, pushing in slowly. He stilled when he was up to the hilt, looking for signs of pain in Alice’s face. All he found was a smile, love and tenderness and he shivered, feeling her inside walls contracting around him.

 “I’m home.”, he whispered as he buried his face in her breasts again. “I’m finally home.” He started thrusting slowly, Alice gripping her hands on his arms and they rolled their hips together, eyes locked in an embrace just as intense as their bodies’, pleasure slowly rising again inside of them.

 Alice bit her lip, whimpers escaping her lips as she leaned her head back, offering her neck to Tom’s kisses. She raised her hips higher and Tom angled himself differently, the head of his shaft rubbing on her sensitive spot every time. Pleasure cries raised from both of them, filling the air, as Tom panted in her ear, thrusting faster. Alice circled his shoulders with her arms, holding him tightly, kissing behind the ear.

 She cupped his face, forcing Tom to look at him while he rammed harder and harder. His brow was furrowed with effort and his eyes so full of love. “I love you, Tom. I’ve always loved you. I was crazy to think I could live without you. I’m so ready for our life to start.”, Alice declared.

 Those words sent Tom into a frenzy, and he cried out as he thrusted erratically, bringing them both into a mind blowing orgasm, Tom spilling himself deep inside of Alice, who dug her nails in his shoulders, her body arching against him. Tom collapsed by her side, careful to not hurt her, and gathered his quivering woman in his arms, as she nestled herself against him.

 It took a long time for their breaths to regulate and the fog to clear from their minds. Alice’s eyes fluttered open and she gently grazed her fingers on Tom’s damp skin, tracing imaginary drawings. “I’m sorry we wasted time, Tom.”, she murmured, peppering his chest with kisses.

 Tom stirred and slid down on the bed, rolling to his side so he could stare at Alice in the eyes. “We didn’t waste time. We just lost our way for a little while. Never again.”, he replied, his hand gently gliding down from her arm to her stomach. “You’ve got me, you’ve got my whole life in there, Alice. Whatever is thrown at us, we’ll face it. Together.”. He accentuated his words by leaning down and gently kissing Alice’s growing bump, as tears of joy rolled on both their faces.

 As they drifted to sleep, a song Alice loved came to her and she was unable to keep it quiet. Her voice rose in the darkened room.

_**They didn't have you where I come from** _

_**Never knew the best was yet to come** _

_**Life began when I saw your face** _

_**And I hear your laugh like a serenade** _

_**How long do you want to be loved?** _

_**Is forever enough, is forever enough?** _

_**How long do you want to be loved?** _

_**Is forever enough?** _

_**Cause I'm never, never giving you up** _

 Tom’s voice joined her, as he knew the song too, having heard it so many times before. When they finished, Tom held Alice tighter against him, kissing the top of her head. “I’m never giving you up again, Alice. Never.”

 Alice picked up Tom’s hand, turning it over and tenderly kissed his palm, wiping a joyous tear away. “Good, cause your wife wouldn’t like that.”, she replied, cupping her own face with his hand.

Tom’s chest shook as he chuckled. He had missed those little pearls of silliness from Alice and with her saying that after these past months, he knew he truly was home.


End file.
